What's the opposite of the most interesting man in the world?

"Bryan doesn't drive a 1M" (bryantakespictures)
06/10/2015 at 12:40 • Filed to: None

Answer: My wife’s uncle who drives a blue Cobalt, whose wife drives a red Cobalt, bought at the same time with some kind of discount.

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To any Cobalt owners: this is not an attack on your car. If you chose your car and enjoy it, then I’m happy for you. The example above is of someone who bought the cheapest possible thing with absolutely no interest in whether it was any good.

DISCUSSION (24)

pauljones > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 12:45

What’s the opposite of the most intersting man in the world?

Probably me.

William Byrd > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 12:47

I might challenge that. My neighbor and his wife have THREE same generation Toyota Corollas. Only one is beige though.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 12:48

I think the important question, though, is if this is habitual for him?

I drove a stripper Cobalt for a couple years and it was so jalop it hurt. Manual transmission, manual seats, manual windows, manual door locks, power nothing! It didn’t even have ABS. It was simultaneously the epitome of cheap shitty car and totally awesome because it just did not give any fucks.

However it was also the low point of my car owning, before I had a Dodge Ram with a 6spd and turbo diesel, and now I have a Cruze turbo. So if he just did it because he needed a cheap ass car like I did, I get it, but if he always buys shitty cars and doesn’t care, then yes, pretty boring.

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > William Byrd
06/10/2015 at 12:51

I’m going to assume they aren’t AE86’s?

You might have a winner, unless your neighbor is so boring that it becomes interesting just how boring they are. Do they have any non-Corollas?

Berang > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 12:52

Replace the cobalts with suburbans.

William Byrd > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 12:52

haha nooo, that would qualify as cool.

They are old (60s+) and I just get the sense they found a car they liked, and kept buying them. It’s not even like they have kids in the house, they drive them. He also has a Ranger I believe.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 12:53

Are we gonna have to start adding these disclaimers every time we state an opinion?

For Sweden > pauljones
06/10/2015 at 12:55

I drive a beige Volvo, come at me pj

Alex B > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
06/10/2015 at 12:56

Probably. People are way too sensitive.

pauljones > For Sweden
06/10/2015 at 12:57

I drive a beige Toyota. Bring it, meatball.

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > Snuze: Needs another Swede
06/10/2015 at 12:57

Oh yeah, I thought he and his wife were the most boring people in the world way before I knew what cars they drove. Finding out about their cars was more of an “of course that’s what they drive” moment.

I love cars with power nothing. That should be a base option for every model. I’d love something like a 228i with power nothing. Or a Tesla... nevermind.

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > pauljones
06/10/2015 at 12:58

Does it have gold lettering? If so, then we might have a winner.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 13:01

Gotcha, that makes more sense.

Also, power-nothing Tesla... the window cranks have little built in generators that recharge the battery a little bit each time you roll the windows up or down.

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
06/10/2015 at 13:01

I hope not, but since I was calling out a specific model I didn’t want to set anything off. Cobalt drivers can be real assholes, you know? Wait, I’m doing it wrong.

For Sweden > pauljones
06/10/2015 at 13:01

Toyota is Japanese. Japan is kawaii. Kawaii is interesting.

pauljones > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 13:02

It does not. It had silver lettering. The car is actually also gray, not beige. But it’s still “beige.”

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > Snuze: Needs another Swede
06/10/2015 at 13:03

Ooooh, genius. How about a “clutch” pedal that also charges the battery every time the driver forgets that there’s only one gear?

LongbowMkII > For Sweden
06/10/2015 at 13:04

Volvo is Swedish. Swedish is intersting. IKEA banks their whole image on “Hey, it’s SWEDISH” There are no national Japanese modular furniture suppliers (although I would totally go to one)

pauljones > For Sweden
06/10/2015 at 13:07

I... have no response to that. Other than the fact that I now want to go Kawaii.

DoYouEvenShift > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 13:14

That guy sounds way cooler than my neighbor. 3 white Corollas. I have a pic saved somewhere.

Bryan doesn't drive a 1M > DoYouEvenShift
06/10/2015 at 13:16

Ok, you win. Are they all the same year?

DoYouEvenShift > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 13:38

Same gen at least, mid 2000s. Small differences in the taillights.

BrownMiataDieselWagon > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/10/2015 at 13:42

Heh. How about this for discount:

Stephen the Canuck > Bryan doesn't drive a 1M
06/12/2015 at 13:43

My girlfriend and I both have leased 2014 Cruzes in dark grey that we got within three days of each other (her first I’ll admit). The only differences are mine is manual, and her’s has a remote started.

Our neighbours also have a blue Sonic hatchback, and a black one now too.